I'm not really proud of what I did today. This morning, my Mom's phone slipped out of her pocket and hit the ground really hard. I was terrified it would break or get scuffed up, but it seems fine. I got mad and chewed her out. We argued, I said she shouldn't keep it in that stupid pocket, and she told me the phone was too slick. I don't know why I got upset, I was really more frustrated with myself for not insisting on getting her a case and screen protector beforehand (which would have made it less slick and more able to survive a drop intact). Now we'll have to wait a week for case to arrive, while the phone keeps getting banged up and may not even work by the time it gets here.
On top of that, later in the day she complained that the fingerprint scanner on her computer wasn't working, and she couldn't enter her password. It turns out Windows was asking for her PIN (not her password), and she didn't know it. Luckily, I remembered it for her. On top of this, she had used the less reliable method of simply turning the computer on and then scanning the fingerprint once she reached Windows, being met with intermittent failure. Turning the computer on via the fingerprint reader and having the BIOS recognize the fingerprints would have been much more reliable. I've shown her this twice now. I got upset then, too, though I only cursed once and not directly at her, though I got a bit testy with her when she mentioned my mouth, because I was mad and didn't want to hear it. A lot of times that's the cycle... I get mad in general, I say something nasty that's not directed at anyone in particular, she criticizes me for losing my temper, and then I direct my anger at her, and then we get into a stupid fight for a few minutes before we both calm down, hug, and apologize.
I wish I wasn't so mean. I mean, she does so much for me and doesn't expect anything in return. I think I'm a terrible person. I've been totally useless my whole life, no one else loves me except her, and I really don't think anyone else would tolerate me. She is pretty much biologically wired to tolerate me because she's my Mom, but I can't imagine anyone other than a blood relative putting up with this. I'm such a burden on her. Even if I have to be useless and rely on her, why is it that I can't at least be consistently nice to basically the only person in the world that loves me and wants to take care of me? Why do I have to act like a dumb dog that bites the hand that feeds it? I understand intellectually I shouldn't cuss her out and shouldn't lose my temper over meaningless little things, but it feels like it happens before I have a chance to reflect on it. And then I have all the time in the world to feel guilty over it. Sigh. I'm probably going to try and get her something nice for her birthday to sort of make up for it. That's coming up next month.
Anyway, other than that, I had a call with Infamous today. It wasn't very long and mostly I just watched him work on a Zelda-related documentation project while I browsed Facebook and sort of nodded along, because he was only making a rough draft and didn't need much input today. He mentioned wanting to create a group chat with interested parties in order to work on the project, and we reassured one another that it's going to be a very topical chat and not something that's going to become a club or clique, because we both hate that.
I spent the bulk of my day doing today talking to Cinderelliot while he was working on a essay and a history presentation. We got onto various topics, like agreeing that the doctrine of purgatory was ridiculous and the sale of indulgences was corrupt. Dante's Inferno compared to biblical hell was the subject of the essay. We also argued briefly about net neutrality, me arguing against it and him arguing for it. I was complaining about the taxes and regulations it creates, and how it drove two of the best local ISPs in my area to sell off their wireline holdings to no-name companies that don't provide as good of a service because they couldn't make as much of a profit under the net neutrality regulations Obama enacted. He seemed comfortable talking to me, because we're both mostly conservative. I myself am more open-minded about accepting government intervention on antitrust regulations that apply to mergers and monopolies to restore a free market situation, but I do not like net neutrality at all because it's more taxes, price controls, more regulations, and a requirement to provide service to areas where it isn't profitable. It's only a step short of making Internet a nationalized utility.
Also, the Super Famicom was released in Japan on November 21st, 1990. So the console is 27 years old today.
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